Wait! You’re Not Worrying About What You Think You’re Worrying About!

The following is the most liberating, practical and helpful thing I’ve ever realised.

Sometimes I wake up worrying about money. I wake up in the morning with this gluey, tense feeling in my guts or solar plexus and immediately my mind starts adding up numbers, working out everything I need to pay for that month and strategising how in the short term and long term I can make this all work out. It’s extremely stressful. Later that day someone might ask me how I’ve been and I might say “I woke up worrying about money again this morning…”

But wait! That’s actually wrong.

If I rewind that morning’s experience and take it atom by tiny atom, this is what is really going on:

I wake up with this gluey, tense feeling in my guts or solar plexus.

It feels really uncomfortable.

THEN my well meaning, yet misguided mind, in order to control and get rid of this yucky feeling in my body, throws up a story or a concept of something worrying that’s going on in my life because it believes, incorrectly, that if my mind can ‘solve’ that problem or situation then the discomfort will go away. The mind is totally well-meaning and due to it’s logical, problem-solving nature, it thinks that by matching this worried feeling to a story or a controllable outcome in my life, that I can get rid of the feeling by solving the life-problem that it has selected for me.

But THIS IS A TRAP. It is a decoy that, rather than making the feeling go away, actually makes the feeling get stronger and last longer. The idea of rejecting that feeling, solving it, getting rid of it in this thinky way ABSOLUTELY DOESN’T WORK. If anything, it perpetuates it and magnifies it by chewing it over and over.

So, back to me lying in bed. What is really going on?

My body, and yours, is the most GENIUS self-mending, self-cleaning organism that we know of in the Universe. It is constantly scanning for viruses and bacteria and harmful agents and then making its own drugs, amazingly secreting things, and administering them to us in the body all day and night while we go on with our lives, (rarely thinking about this miraculous self-mending process that’s constantly going on). The genius body system is also regenerating our cells with any energy or resources it can draw upon. Our skin mends if we cut it. Our bones knit and mend if we break them. It goes on and on, organs, glands, sophisticated mending and healing systems constantly working. BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE…

…our body is also self-mending and cleaning all our accumulated EMOTIONAL pain and stress in just as sophisticated a way. This is why we wake up, often, with a very uncomfortable tightness or stuckness down our front, somewhere from the throat to the belly. It’s NOT because we’ve woken up worrying about money, or our health, or any of the mind’s versions of what’s ‘wrong’ in our lives. NO! It’s simply because our genius mind/body system is doing a well-needed emotional poo. It is offloading some of the accumulation of emotional pain that we all carry and it cleverly waits until these moments, when we’re not so busy or thinky, to do it.

Please get this. It will radically change your life for the better. You’re not worrying about what you think you’re worrying about.

When we wake up and feel the feeling of that constipation being pushed through by our genius mind/body system, the mind, before we’ve even remembered who we are in the morning, gets busy in it’s well-meaning way, to give us ‘the reason’ for this discomfort imagining that if we can solve it then the feeling might go away. This is the most distracting, incorrect and useless strategy that sucks us in every time. We lie there in bed turning that problem over and over trying to solve it and this GETS IN THE WAY of the genius process our body is doing, which is cleverly shitting out some accumulated emotional pain and stress.

At these times if we are skillful, we will ignore the mind’s version COMPLETELY and only focus on the physical sensation. If we place our attention on the yucky, tight feeling in the body and gently breathe into it, allowing it, even encouraging it, staying with it in a soft and trusting way, knowing it’s part of our body’s genius process, not ‘something’s wrong today’ then miraculously it moves, it shifts, it transforms. We need to take the attitude that we are sitting with a child who is constipated and feeling insecure. All we need to do is hold it’s hand, and be there, fully present – nothing more.

Do not get tricked into the mind’s version of your morning emotional poo any longer!

And this doesn’t only apply to the morning wake-up tension. Exactly the same is true for every time we are triggered, upset, or reactive to something that has happened ‘to us’ during the day. I believe that our genius body/mind system, or Life itself, is daily sending us difficult and challenging situations and people DELIBERATELY to trigger the body into releasing that stuck emotion. That’s the very reason adversity exists in our lives. It’s part of the genius way Life itself is mending us and cleaning us. When someone upsets me, if I am skillful, I will feel the familiar volcanic eruption of pain, anger, fear, in my chest and instead of fighting that person, I will go straight to the physical place where my body has started shitting out accumulated tension and only deal with that person AFTER I have attended to and dissolved what just happened in my body.

What I’m saying is that difficult people are WALKING LAXATIVES! It may sound radical but it’s true. When someone upsets us we experience a totally disproportionate reaction. We feel the pain of everyone who ever treated us that way back to our childhood. This is the body’s genius finding ways to self-clean, self-mend all that accumulation. We attract and react to those people or events as a way to heal ourselves.

Could it be that ALL this adversity is actually a gift? A benevolent invitation for the skillful to poo out some harmful, stressful built up stuff in us?

When I treat these triggers this way I become POWERFUL. Suddenly, rather than be disempowered by the events I am now using them for their correct purpose which is Life’s genius, cleaning and unclogging me by finding ways to discharge accumulated emotional shit.

Don’t believe your mind in the morning when you wake up worrying! It’s just your genius doing it’s work. PARTICIPATE with it, don’t resist it. Don’t believe the mind’s victim story of what happened to you – on the human level it hurt, but on a deeper level it’s just part of Life’s genius giving you the opportunity to offload some toxic old pain. Breathe into it, let it dissolve and shift – above all DON’T THINK!

USE IT and empower yourself with all apparent adversity! This is the point of all challenging feelings and events.

All workshops and talks at www.jamiecatto.com

19 comments

  1. This is a very marvellous and liberating post, thank you for these wise words at the start of the day. Reminded me of so much wise stuff about releasing ’emotionally frozen moments’ and seeing every ‘problem’ as a gift in disguise and remembering that the beautiful lotus flower grows only in a mucky pond. When people start to see each other as gifts or as welcome laxatives for their own emotional shit, we might even all stop fighting each other. Instead we will release our egos and say, “Brother/sister, let us fight together to transform this shared pain.”

    28 years ago, I first read these words which remind me of your post: “When we are upset, it’s easy to blame others. However, the true cause of our feelings is within us. For example, imagine yourself as a glass of water. Now, imagine past negative experiences as sediment at the bottom of your glass. Next, think of others as spoons. When one stirs, the sediment clouds your water. It may appear that the spoon caused the water to cloud – but if there were no sediment, the water would remain clear no matter what. The key, then, is to identify our sediment and actively work to remove it.” (Josei Toda, Buddhist teacher.)

    More on how to thank the spoons in your life at: http://www.thankingthespoon.com
    Right, I am off to take a deep plunge into my own yucky stuff / genius…
    Dx

    PS. People who worry a lot have fantastic imaginations…

  2. Wonderful article! Same realization that changed my life years ago and what I try to help people realize. Well written! Thank you! I will share this with my clients.I went to your website and I love it too, I work the same way financially and this is important to me so I was excited to see you do the same! No one turned away! Your web site is sophisticated and beautiful! I need to learn how to create one like that. I am happy to see more and more people make this realization and help others get it too. So much needless suffering is perpetuated by our mistaken thinking. Much love to you!

  3. i will try and take this advice and use it for a higher purpose. I know I can achieve great things if I just get over the anxiety, depression and self consciousness I feel each and every day. It’s out there for you and I to grab, just out of reach. Lets go get it 🙂

  4. Jamie – I’ve actually grown to enjoy the early morning hours in bed by working on this. If I awake feeling anxious, I embrace it and Whether through EFT tapping, or visualisation or the simple repetition of my mantra or the word “love”, an exquisite shift can occur.
    BTW – I like the “poo” analogy.

  5. thanks for this blog, I have experienced the change from what my mind thinks about my pain, and not listening/believing it, when I wake up. that ‘me’ is no the authentic me, so I have learned to put it I n it’s place, and I am a lot happier, and more effective in life as a result

  6. v helpful – the mind is only trying to help … but it gets in the way sometimes. “above all DON’T THINK!” is often the best strategy. I also have to remind my mind that when it wrestles with a ‘problem’ it is simply mistaken – challenging people or situations are the very fuel for our growth into a fuller life.

  7. I went through a very dark period of years during which time my psychopathic brother emotionally raped and tortured me – leaving me for dead. Very real and extremely debilitating. I then went through some very transformational healing with an NLP/Hypnotherpaist that involved me ‘pooing’ on my brother’s face (which I drew on a piece of paper complete with every bad thought I had of him scribbled all over it with black marker – like asshole, psycho, liar, bully, fucking pig, etc. – then tore that piece of paper up into little tiny pieces in a bowl and waited for a very large movement). That together with some other regular tapping exercises freed me from years of depression and the downward spiral he had taken me to. It was incredible to me as it only took one hour of therapy and then the follow up to make such a difference in my life. This article is also along those same lines and very helpful. Thank you.

  8. Fabulous post and a way to laugh at the magical process of the body. Thinking of challenging people as laxatives is genius. Thanks for reminding us how wonderful our bodies are. I’m going to keep your words and re-read them as required.

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