from Raisa:
There is not a single question that a child will not ask and there are no questions that should be banned from being asked because when a child meets the World, naturally inquiry arises. In this inquiry the child seeks intimacy with his or her World.
Intimacy is our natural state. It is the state we are born into. Somewhere along the way though, sitting in a primary school classroom, we asked a wrong question and people laughed at us. Somewhere along the way we faced others’ humiliation, dismissal, judgment and negativity when asking our questions, and we learned not to ask ALL questions. In some cases, not to ask any questions at all.
We learnt these lessons at a young age when we often didn’t have the mental capacity to question these negative responses to our questions. Because we sought intimacy and were dismissed, we came to the conclusion that there must have been something wrong with us and our questions. Not only did we then begin to suppress our inquisitiveness but we also stopped our search for intimacy. We dismissed our own need for intimacy in the same way that people dismissed us.
Look at your partner openly this evening, or look at yourself in the mirror, with your most childlike eyes, with the eyes of curiosity and fascination. What do you see? Please share with us below. Be specific. Be curious. And above all give yourself full permission to be inquisitive.
What About Intimacy weekends at http://www.jamiecatto.com/about_intimacy
Innocence~Playfulness~Depth~Infinite Potential~Beauty~
This moment…Truth!
I liked very much to read and realize the fact about how we aren’t in a mature state when we are children and unable to fully process it in our minds, or even how much we don’t concern about it during our childhood.
Maybe that’s the difference between a child and an adult. I have a son and I am trying to observe how much this could afect him and how much he couldn’t avoid it.
Raisa, it’s been quite difficult to just talk about me, and it’s been so uncomfortable to say what I see at the mirror. But it’s not a hard feeling for me; I am just dealing with the moment. How I feel now, it’s ok, and let’s see how I feel it tomorrow, it’s ok as well.
Beautiful work you both adre doing!
Love,
Paula
I tried ever so hard to ‘fit in’ in my early teens, I never felt good enough, attractive enough, funny enough.. it was never ending.. .somewhere in mid 20′s I had a dream whilst struggling with various crises, and in my dream an adult me held hands with a 7 year old me….adult me was confused, crying and fearful but child me was courageous and comforting. I looked in the mirror recently and recognised the child again – she wasn’t far away all this time but I had been ashamed of her and tried to change her into someone else. Anyway, I have welcomed her back – and am growing happier each day because of this.
deeply touching Raisa, most beautiful, especially from the perspective of being a mama now too..am loving your writing, the total understanding, playful, inquiring…most fresh…thank you dear heart x